Who is Video Game Henchmen?

Alright, so this has been in the back of my head since I was reading your articles.

Who are you guys?

I mean, I know your names but any brief introduction?

I guess I can kick things off.

What's up guys! My name's Jacob. I live in Gainesville, FL about to be a sophomore in college. I've been playing video games with my 2 brothers for about as long as I can remember, but never really got into them until I picked up an Xbox about 3 or 4 years ago. I won't go into too much detail because we have a special intro segment in mind for the first podcast.

As for VGH, a few friends and myself thought it would be fun to write video game reviews and post our thoughts on the latest news and happenings in the video game world, so we decided to start up Video Game Henchmen and it kind of took off from there. We had no idea that people would enjoy reading our articles, we just thought it would be a fun side project to do. Turns out you guys actually like our articles! I guess all those years in AP English in high school didn't go to waste.

Anyways, that's all from me. I actually just got back from Radio Shack and got a butt load of cables to see if I can't get this broadcast thing working. Keep your fingers crossed!

Who is Video Game Henchmen?

The most elite team, when it comes to precision and accuracy of Video Game technology news and reviews.
Just kidding...

I can go ahead and introduce myself.

My name is Lance, and I am 20 years old. I was born and raised in Chicago, IL and moved down to Gainesville, FL my junior year in High School. I am currently a sophomore in College. The whole point of VGH is to present a point of view. A point of view in which normal everyday gamers like myself and my crew would express our feelings about these video games that really never "made it" to the eyes of the big industry websites like IGN, Gamespot, 1UP, GameSpy, etc. We express deep sympathy for the developers as well as the consumer so we judge our reviews based off the idea that, "Is this game really worth buying?" and "How much time and effort was put into this game." This concept of an everyday gamer is really important to us because at the end of the day, no matter who we are. We would sit back and just relax and play a good game and nothing beats that feeling of playing a good game and we at Video Game Henchmen would gladly do the dirty work for you.

Whoah, my thread went on to it's own forum topic!

Btw. Lance, I really like the concept of the everyday gamer. I feel like everyone should sometimes just think about having fun rather than the pocket money they are getting for writing a good review and ripping ordinary people off.

That's a big reason why I like their articles about video games, because they tell it the way it is with no shit.

Really good!

Honesty is key!

Hello, I'm David.

Where do I begin? My father was a relentlessly self-improving blongerie owner from Belgium. With low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a 15 year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink, he would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy...the sort of..general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. My childhood was typical, summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the Spring we’d make meat helmets. When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds, pretty standard…really. At the age of twelve I received my first scribe. At the age of fourteen, a Zoroastrian woman named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum, it’s breathtaking really, I suggest you try it.

Dr. Evil quoting aside, I just want to take a quick second to thank you guys for your interest in the site. These boys work hard to make this site look legitimate and I am honored to make any positive contribution I can.


That being said, I am probably the most casual gamer on the entire VGH roster. I'm not going to uncover beautiful gems like El Shaddei or play every hot title that comes out, but I enjoy the hell out of a good video game. I mostly play sports titles, as there are few things more competitive than that. FPS games are huge in my book, If I can get a dome shot, I love it.

RPG's are pretty fun, but I feel incredibly ADD when I play them, you know getting bored after like 5 missions...or when I die and have to restart from my last save point.

It took me 3 hours to beat "No Fighting In The War Room" on Veteran difficulty, I think a part of me died that day...

I'm a pretty chill guy, but I guess you could say I get easily slighted...which would suck if I wasn't such a forgiving person. My hobbies include playing video games, obviously, being a kool kollege kid, stalking women on facebook, and defending Avatar as a great movie from John Partin.

I laugh at just about everything. From the boring SNL skits to retardedly random videos from Sean.

My favorite music is the good kind, creative and emotional. Explosions in the Sky are easily my favorite band, but the more instrumental and ambient bands I discover, the more their throne is threatened.

The Beatles and Brand New are my two favorite bands that don't play 10 minute songs. I think Jesse Lacey (songwriter for Brand New) is one of the most brilliant songwriters in the business, and the evolution and maturation of the band is something that you don't see often nowadays.

One thing you guys should definitely know about me is that I am the self proclaimed Comeback King. What does that mean, you ask. Well it means that I have this innate ability to rally from deficits, and either win dramatically, or come up short, painfully. And this isn't limited to video games, although Xbox Live is where I first put on my crown.

No, I comeback in life. Freshman year in my Earth & Space Science class, I had a 47% grade for my progress report. Pulled off an 79% for my report card teacher didn't round. Bitch.

So, feel free to talk to me, I'm a friendly person and I pretty much like everyone, except Ragnarok95, but who does?

LMFAO, three words to describe that "Best Description Ever." I really enjoyed reading your post and since you are one of the editors/writers here at VGH then I look forward to your articles because they will be surely a pleasure to read.

All Hail David.

I can't wait to read your articles David! Really, nice to hear from you dude.

Forgotten_Gamer wrote:

LMFAO, three words to describe that "Best Description Ever." I really enjoyed reading your post and since you are one of the editors/writers here at VGH then I look forward to your articles because they will be surely a pleasure to read.

All Hail David.

Haha, thanks man, I thought the Dr. Evil quote was just the way to go.

Welcome to the forums!

Nice to finally hear from you David, can't wait for your articles.

Well I've been in North Carolina for a bit so I haven't had too much time to dedicate as of right now because of the cabin my family and I are staying in has no internet, anywhoo my name is Evan Gardiner and I've lived in Gainesville, Florida all my life. I'm 18 and attend Flagler College where I study Political Science and Pre-Law. A few years back good ole David called me up frantically "EVAN OMG!!! I'm like the leader of a clan on xbox and I need to come to your house cause my internet is down." "Sure w/e David come on over, I wasn't playing video games at all..."
It was at this point that I was united with a large percentage of the VGH crew, which is really funny cause I already knew them but haven't ever talked to them, but yea I love was born, the love of brotherhood.
John, Sean, Jacob, Lance, and David are my brothers, Kurt is like that yappy dog that you want to kick around yet still keep around because he's adorable. I sometimes act flamboyantly homosexual, but in the end is all straight because I have a girlfriend, ps did anyone else like that pun, yea I'm good like that.
Video game wise I'm pretty open to about anything, I'm a tri-sexual...I'll try anything once. I've even tried sports games a couple of times. Shooters, RPG's, RTS's, racing, etc there all good. Favorite game wise, anything made by Bethesda catches my eye and Mario Kart is amazing, actually I'm like a Mario Kart god if anyone dare challenge me I will smite them without mercy.
Another thing I love is the creative and originality of Avatar by James Cameron, easily an astounding and captivating film. In addition to the Owls of Gathoolkfhuebvejrg, the new movie with Owls looks equally amazing.
Well, that's all I can think of and I think my mom wants to leave the Wendy's where I'm pirating there Wifi so ttyl. If you wanna talk anytime just hit me up, usually I'm pretty friendly.

We seem to have a wacky bunch of writers, that's always good.